So. I knew that the massive amounts of depressing posts would catch up with me sooner or later - now you all are worried about me, I guess.

Um. Yeah. So obviously I need loads of support and stuff. But as I've said before, it's not my fault that every time I try to type up an LJ post I feel depressed. Part of it is maybe that (I think I've said this before, too...) also that when I need to release negative emotion, this is the ideal format. Positive emotion I can release in many other ways.

newaiz. I haven't typed up the several good posts I've been planning because I wanted to make it long and good and worth it. But here it is in a nutshell.

I want to live. There is so much in this world, hideous and beautiful, simplistic and intricate, understood and mysterious, and it's all waiting for me. It's all out there just waiting for me to come. There is so much to see, so much to do, so much to learn and I want to know it all. This world has more to offer me than I can imagine and I am not going to just let it pass me by.

It's rather exciting when one thinks about it. So many things in the world, so much that one person can't possibly experience even a small fraction of it in their entire life time. And you know what? It's all there at my feet. The road goes down from the door where it began, leading to wherever I want it to go. There's nothing stopping me from following my dreams, despite how corny it sounds. And every time I think about it, it makes me smile just a little.

and every day I wake I tell myself a little harmless lie...the whole wide world is mine

-SXM, Sarah Meholick, Esq.